I am hooked on the Impact Theory. This particular interview with Joe Dispenza was one of the most insightful and thought-provoking ones.
The main thoughts that I took away from this speech:
Negative events generate a rush of energy which gets captured by the memory in a snapshot. Retrieving that snapshot from memory brings on the same neurochemical reactions in our body that were present when the event occurred. People lack emotional stimulation in their day to day life, and they go back to negative memories because they are addicted to the energy that those memories generate, so that they could feel SOMETHING
Body is our subconscious mind, it does not know the difference between a physical reaction triggered by a real event and a remembered or imagined one. Emotions elicit a physical response, which in turn elicits emotion; this circuit becomes hard-wired.
Habits are hard-wired circuits in our brains that eventually which form from a repetition of the same behavior until our body can guide behavior better than our mind can
Changing something can feel very uncomfortable because new circuits need to be build while the old ones are trying to fire signals. New choices do not “feel right” because you would not have the same neurochemical mix in the brain, you are in a new state of uncertainty. The body always tries to return to the familiar biological state. That is why being in the unknown state is difficult for most people.
If you follow the body’s reactions, eventually it will create the environment around you to support your familiar state. The body becomes stronger than the brain, the servant becomes the master.
Meditation accesses the OS-level of our brain, where important changes are possible. When you close your eyes, you shut down external stimuli, so you can now create your own reactions. If the body cannot distinguish between a physical reaction from a past negative event or from a thought of that event, then the same principle is in play when you imagine a future event with a positive outcome. Your brain is no longer a record of the past, but a path to the future.
The hard part is to teach the body to respond to future events. Do not wait until you have success to feel successful, until you have money to feel abundance, until you are in a new relationship to feel loved. Do not wait for something outside of you to happen in order to trigger the emotion. Trigger it yourself. Stop being the creation, become the creator.
Your environment creates your thoughts, and then your thoughts create your environment.
If you do not wake up in the morning and think about the future that you want to create, then your mind will be left with the memories of the past, which is predictable, so you start having a predictable future, and your current environment will reinforce it.
Most people need some outside events to feel something, but you can change that
Your body is addicted to having certain neurochemical states at certain times a day. Train your body to stay in the moment, like you tell a dog to stay, do not react during those hours.O
Our bodies are addicted to strong emotions like love, hate, judgement, jealousy, being a victim. We use our boss to satisfy our judgement addition, our enemies to satisfy our anger addiction, etc. To make a positive change, you have to change yourself first. If today I took your ex-husband and shoot him to the moon so he cannot come back, that will not change your life, you still have to do the work of change! If you don’t, you will find the next guy to hate. If I took your enemy and made him disappear, you would create another one in his place.
We learn most about ourselves when we are uncomfortable, usually because we do not like being in the present moment, the body wants to go back to the familiar.
Insights, the aha moments are passive, they do not do anything in themselves. Even worse, they can be used as an excuse to slide into predictability, to the old habits, to avoid change, because when you understand the neurochemical process better, you can be better at creating an excuse for it.
Our bodies are designs to use stress to avoid danger or to get something, but the stress is supposed to be intense and short-lived, like a sight of a predator at a distance. But what happens if the stress is near and constant, like a hated co-worker sitting next to you whole year long? What happens is disease. No organism can survive a prolonged and constant stress.
My journey continues today with a video of TomBilyau interviewing Jordan Harbringer
My biggest take-aways:
Confidence can be trained into behavior to elicit a certain response from people. Once people start treating you differently, your confidence will become more natural
Adjust your body posture to communicate confidence every time you are walking through a door. Put yourself some stickers on the door to serve you as reminders to do that. After a while, you won’t need the stickers, it will happen automatically
Don’t wait until you are thirsty to start digging a well. Don’t wait until you need a relationship to start building one
Do not build a relationship on “what’s in it for me?” Do not worry about what’s in it for you – just build it, and the opportunities may come later
Do not keep score, do not create covert contracts that exist only in your head; do not expect people to return the favors you did for them. Covert contracts poison the relationships. Give without expectations or attachments
Save for the future. Do not wait until you are thirsty to start digging your well financially. Do not try to make short-term profit on long-term goals.
When experiencing depression or anxiety, zoom out enough to get proper perspective. Every second you spend feeling sorry for yourself is a total waste of time
Alot of anxiety is just bottled-up emotion and energy, like a blender without a lid throwing its contents all over the kitchen; if you channel this energy properly, it will subside
How are you going to do it? One step at a time, one brick at a time, one day at a time. Like building a castle from a box of small oncies in Lego. You just keep stacking them one next to another next to another, and one day someone will ask: “Wow, how did you build it?”
Action ends suffering. Try to take an action on a suffering rather than trying to take a bath in it.
The biggest moments from the interview that struck a nerve with me were:
The difference between entrepreneurs and employees is the amount of uncertainty they have to deal with. Some people think that entrepreneurs are somehow born with the innate superior ability to deal with uncertainly. Alex’s research shows otherwise.
Ability to deal with uncertainty is like a muscle. We can train a muscle to be stronger by using it. Approach your fear of uncertainty like you would approach training in a gym. Don’t just grab a 60 lb weight and start curling. Start with a 2 lb weight and then increase a little over time. If you feel a panic attack, it is a good indicator that you have picked up a weight that is too heavy for you. Do not get discouraged. Step back, recover a bit, then return to training with a slightly lighter weight, and continue to build in increments.
Interesting line from a book called “When things fall apart” by Pema Chödrön. How do you deal with your fear? I agree with it.
Story about Steven Spielberg and Chuck Silvers. Jump off the train. Schmooze your way in. Find an inside man who will believe in you enough to take a personal risk. Without Chuck Silvers there might not have been Steve Spielberg. But it is the same story with other successful people, like Bill Gates or Lady Gaga. They had someone on the inside who believed in them enough to take a risk.
I need to look up the book “Outliers” by Malcolm Gladwell
I never heard of Qi Li, but I need to read more on his story. The quote from the interview was when Alex asked Qi what role luck played in his life, Qi answered that luck is like a bus that stops next to you at some intervals. If you missed one bus, do not worry, another will come. But to get on the bus, you need to have the correct amount of work and accomplishments – your bus pass. For most people, the bus stops all the time, but they cannot get in because they don’t have the correct pass to take advantage of the opportunity in front of them.
Insecurity, like fear, never leave you. They will always be a part of your experience. The goal is to be aware that some of your thoughts and feelings are just insecurities. Once awareness is achieved, they lose their power over your decisions. You can always look at them and say, “Oh, that is just my insecurity showing up.” To deal with insecurity, you must speak of it outloud. Insecurity lives in secrecy, and is protected by feelings of shame. Once you break down the wall of shame and speak of it publically, the insecurity becomes manageable.
I have been listening to Frank Cordone’s video “Dominate” for several days, and it is hard to believe how quickly my view on everyday’s interactions has changed since then.
My favorite quotes:
0:05 – You do not want to be a spectator. Spectators pay. Players get paid.
2:33 – Look, if you want to be in business for yourself and you want to be successful, you will need to learn to dominate. You cannot compete…. Look, how many of you have been trained in trained in this? Competition is a healthy thing. If that message was not being delivered to on to entrepreneurs! This message was being delivered to consumers! Them more companies we have, the better for the customer!… But if you’re the one playing the game, you want to dominate the field! Would you agree? Let’s say I’m playing a basketball game, or a football game… I want to be on the offense the whole time!
When somebody googles the industry that you’re in your picture should come up! And if this is not happening, then the market place will deliver pain for you. The marketplace will deliver pain to the people that compete. Why? Because you’re all competing! And there is one guy who is up there in the lead! You see, he didn’t compete.
When this happens, when the economy rolls over, you know who is going to feel the pain? People that compete. Who will cherish that moment? The people that dominate space. Why? Because people that dominate like contractions. People who are extremely well versed, well trained, you know, if I’m training for the ballgame, I like the muddy field! I like it wet! I’m like ice on the field, would you agree? Because I want to dominate space, I actually look for the opportunities for contraction.ike the muddy field! I like it wet! I’m like ice on the field, would you agree? Because I want to dominate space, I actually look for the opportunities for contraction.
8:10 And the marketplace will always discipline people who aren’t prepared. Success loves preparation it loves it, it admires it, and just flows to it. And the marketplace will discipline those who are just stuck in the past.
9:00 Who would do you think is your number one competition? who is your number one problem in real estate today?.. People around you. Any time I have production stalled to that one of my companies, I start to look around. I’m not looking for talent. I look to get rid of people. First thing I do every time: whom can I get rid of? You know why? Because I push with so much force in my universe, and my business, in my real estate…. And I push so hard that if I’m not getting the results all the time, somebody got to be pushing back. Somebody in my organization actually have to have the intention, when are conscious or unconscious, to hold me up. So the first thing that I do is starting to get rid of people. I’m looking who is it? Who is it? I’m looking for the cancer in my organization
This video really gets me in a mood to rock and roll in the morning. It is a collection of very good thoughts from various success role models. I like it because the topics vary, covering several obstacles everyone usually faces.
0:37 If you ever say to somebody else: “Why are you up so early?” this is the quickest tell that you’re not a winning player 1:03 I wanted you to understand that it is not going to happen by luck. Productivity is always intentional and deliberate…. Every single day if you do a little then you’re going to wake up one day in your dreams are going to be at a reality.
1:20 If you can’t just say you want it. It is cute to say it, but when the sun comes up.. You’ve got all the books and you’ve got all it takes you’ve got all the access. Now it’s time to hunt. And what separates you from anybody else is that win it this time to hunt you are ready to hunt. (Les Brown)We are not designed to do things that are uncomfortable, or scary or difficult. Our minds are designed to protect us from those things. .. And in order to change in order to build a business in order to do all the things that you want, you will have to do things that are difficult uncertain or scary. (Mel Robins)
2:05 Why can’t it so hard to do their little things that would improve my life? The way that our minds are designing and is they are are designed to stop you at all costs from anything that might hurt you. We are not designed to do things that are uncomfortable, or scary or difficult. Our minds are designed to protect us from those things. .. And in order to change in order to build a business in order to do all the things that you want, you will have to do things that are difficult uncertain or scary. (Mel Robins)
3:16 the one thing that we have in this world is that we can’t control the events. But we can choose what the focus on, which can choose what things mean and that we can choose what to do. Those three choices, those three decisions really control our lives (Tony Robbins)
3.35 you can always make a decision that is always in your control. Staying with somebody who treats you like garbage – it’s a decision, it is! Staying in the job that you hate – it’s a decision! Staying in the body that you are not proud of – it’s a decision. (Mel Robins)
4:04 It is not the smartest people who achieve success, it’s that people who procrastinate less make fewer excuses, as they take action every day towards the goals that they want to achieve.
4:41 if you want to be successful in any thing in life, never leave this site offsetting the goal without doing something that would commit you to fulfill it. (Tony Robbins)
4:50 the next morning the alarm goes off, and I pretended that NASA was there. And it is the stupidest start I literally counted five four three two one out loud and then I stood up. And I will never forget standing there in my bedroom. It was dark it was cold it was winter in Boston. And for the first time in three months I have beaten the habit of hitting the snooze button. .. There are moments all day long all day long just like those 5 seconds in bed, where I knew – knowledge – what I should do, and if I did not move within 5 seconds my brain would step in and talk me out of it. Every human has a five-second window in which you can move from idea to action before your brain kicks until a full gear and sabotages any change in behavior (Mel Robins)
6:00 your life is what you think it should be. That is exactly what you are right now. You are what you thought you should be. And if you don’t like who you are then you should change who you think you should be. What you think is more important than what you do.
6:30 Decide. Commit. Act. Succeed. Repeat. The one thing that all the greats have in common is that they sweat the small stuff. They pay a very close attention to every detail
6:44 what makes you comfortable can ruin you. While what makes you uncomfortable is the only way to grow.
6:50 what you are in what you become depends on how well you use your time. The billionaire and the beggar both have 24 hours every day. .. You cannot stop a day. You cannot stop an hour. But you can control how it will be used.
8:02 I have to teach people daily you have to prime yourself. You have to do something for 10 minutes, and if you don’t have 10 minutes then you don’t have a life (Tony Robbins)
8:20 I literally remind myself every day. When I wake up in the morning I write my goals down when I go to bed that I write my goals down. It is the first thing and the last thing that I do every day. I have been doing it for 25 years (Grant Cardone)
8:42 but life is constant growth. My life isn’t here because I went to one seminar one time and now my life is set for life. I work out, I train my mind, I train my body, and it becomes a lifestyle (Tony Robbins)
8:56 discipline is one of the most important things that we can develop in our lives. Because without that ability to be sort golf self reliant and willful to get things done on a continual basis we never get that great amount of of momentum and progress towards what we really want.
9:11 first time I wake up in the morning I prime myself. That’s what I have done for years. I change my body, because radical breathing patterns or radical movement, but then I’d do it for 10 minutes, 3 1/2 minutes of pure gratitude about three things, and the reason for gratitude is: the two emotions that mess up the most are fear and anger. And you can not be grateful and fearful simultaneously. They don’t go together. And then I do 3 minutes of “three to thrive,” what are the three outcomes or results that I m really committed to, and I see them as done and fulfilled? (Tony Robbins)
9:43 the first idea is to emotionally engage with your dream. Each morning of your life. See, a lot of people don’t actually struggle with the discipline of doing the things, it’s just that they’re not getting revved up to do the thing. In other warrants we’ve got a problem with motivation. Not necessarily just discipline.
10.05 where does motivation starts and stops? Everybody’s got a different answer. But here is what I can tell you.. It’s that it easy to be motivated. Either you’ve got it or you can watch it. It’s very hard to execute. It is the variable that separates of the people.
11:04 if you want a lot of discipline you need a high level of emotional connection and focus on that thing that you want to work towards. So every morning what I want you to do is to start a new visualization practice. When you wake up in the morning, close your eyes, think about the dream, the aspiration, the things that you are really after in life. And just visualize it. And really get yourself emotionally attached., Emotionally engaged with that. Think about how great it would feel for you to have that thing. Or be that thing. To make that difference. Just think about it, and allow it to well up inside of you by little bit, remember the dream! That’s why we get away from discipline, because we are so busy with the chaos of the world that we are emotionally no longer attached in a way that our brain says: hey man, focus on it, it’s important! Remember?
12:18 the reason that many people don’t have a lot of discipline in their lives is because they allowed their days to be ruled by randomness. They don’t have blocks of time that have been scheduled to do the things that they are supposed to do. So they are counting on sudden will. Oh, you know I will get that today . Or I’ll get to that one day. And of course “someday” turns to “never”, and then they start blaming their discipline. It is not their discipline. It’s the lack of q calendar that says “do this now.” So, schedule what must make happen, and suddenly you will find yourself: “Oh, I’m so disciplined!” you need to have scheduled blocks off time we’re in that discipline happens every day, and that is the only thing that happens. You can always do something every day towards your dream. And if you believe that, it could be something small, like doing some research, journaling, or taking some action, creating that presentation, making that call, whatever it this way you- you can’t do that every day.
13:13 just because you’re doing a lot more doesn’t mean that you’re getting a lot more Done. Don’t confuse movement was progress.
13:37 You and don’t start because of what you don’t have. You don’t start because you don’t realize yet that this fruit of everything good in life begins with a challenge. There’s nothing easy life. Everything is uphill that is worthwhile. In its not going to come to you. It is not going to fall in your lap, and it’s not going to be something that “Oh gosh , that was so simple!” It’s always going to be difficult.
14:12 The only way that to you are going to get to the other side of the journey is that you have got to suffer. To grow. To grow you must suffer. Most of this generation quits the second that they get talked to. “ You did that this wrong !” or they get yelled at. It is so easy to be great now days, because most people are weak. This is a softened generation. So if you have a new mental toughness, any ability, if you have a new fraction of self discipline, the ability to not to want to do it but still do it. .. But if he can get through doing which are hate to do, on the other side is greatness.
15.26 So have dreams, but have goals. Life goals. Yearly goals. Weekly goals. Daily goals. And understand that to achieve these goals you must apply discipline and consistency. .. Everyday. Not just one Tuesday, and then miss a few days. You have to work at it. Every day you have to plan. Every day you’re going to say: “we don’t plan to fail , we fail to plan.” Hard at work works. Working really hard is what successful people do.
16:27 For me to fix this a must figure out what the hell is it wrong with David Goggins. Not blame anybody. I’m afraid of my shadow. How can I overcome that? Go to the military, get your asked kicked. Do things you hate to do. Be uncomfortable every day of your life. Roger that. I’m not the smartest kid in the world. OK. But somebody will say: “O no , you are smart! No, no, don’t say that to yourself! ” I said to myself: “Im a dumb mother fucker!” OK, roger that! How do you get smarter? Educate yourself! So that things that we run from, we run from the truth! We run from the truth, man! So the only way I became successful was going to forward to the truth! As painful, as brutal as it is, it changed me! It allowed me to become, in my own the right, who I am today. Tighten up, people! Trust me . It’s OK! A You might be called a nigger one day. It’s OK! You might be called some Jewish ward, or some faggot or gay word. It’s OK! Let them call you that! What are you going to do now? They don’t control your life. How are you going to control that now? How are you going to flip it upside down, and say: “Roger that!” now I’m going to go hardest as shit. And you will read about me years from now. How? That’s the question. How are you going to do that? Thicken your skin. Become more of a human being. Don’t be afraid of the deflection in the mirror. Because that’s all you can be afraid of! Once you overcome the reflection in the mirror, you have done it! (David Goggins)
18:07 I like something that Les Brown said ones. He said: “there are losers, and they are people who have not learned how to win.” My question to you is this: “which one are you? Are you a loser? Or are you still learning how to win? ” if you are a loser, that does not mean that you are less than, it could mean that you’ve got really good at quitting. It could mean that you’ve got really comfortable quitting the race before the finish line. You have your of reasons for not finishing, and I had mine, too. But right here, and the right now, the question is: do you want to win?
18:45 Self discipline separates from success and not being successful. I have never met a person who was not successful that did not have that great amount of self discipline in life. Self discipline and being able to perform, able to keep your life on schedule, and being able to meet commitments and promises and meet deadlines, is essential to success.
19.15 look, if you really want to get rich, if you really want to be successful, and I’m not talking about money. I’m talking about a rich life. Freedom. Time was family. Choices. Get to do what you want. See, this is what people do. They set the target. Remember, when you were a kid, you set targets that were big. Giant! Had nothing to do with the reason. They wore giant, right? And then you had some difficulty getting to it, and somebody said: “Dude, your goals are unrealistic! You need to drop your goals down!” . And add 40 years. And end up with nothing! Certainly not congruent with your potential . (Grant Cordone)
19:58 None of us can afford to have a life that is controlled by someone else. Or a life that is basically controlled by our emotions. I learned that many years ago that there were two kinds of people. There is a type of person who says: “I will wait until I feel like it before I do it.” and then, there is a person who says: “I’ve got to do it so I feel like it.” one will never get anything done, because there still waiting to feel the moment to move, but the other person says: “No, I need to move, so I can begin to feel the movement!”
20.38 most people have strategies available, or they can get them, or you could create them. The problem is – you’ve got a story! And this story is why it is not working. And the story is: “I have tried everything!”. If you have tried everything, you would have been successful. If you have tried everything, you would have been profitable. There is always a story. And what I tell people is: “if he can just divorce yourself from this story of your limitations, in marry the truth of your unlimited capacity, then the whole game changes. ” (Tony Robbinson)
20:58 Most of us in our lives, we try to make a 10% improvement. And that we know this. But the fact of the matter is, that there are those in the world who go 10 times bigger. And everyone one of us can be that.
21:34 I would say to you that it is your duty, your obligation, your responsibility to fulfill your potential. And that actually is what success is. Success is not money. (Grant Cordone) )
21:43 the biggest thing is: get crazily hungry for something. And you all know, that when you get that hungry, that desirous for something, your brain starts coming up with answers. And then it is a massive action and effective execution, which is modeling, which is what I assume it is all about. Find the best example. Compress the time. Let someone else to take 20 years to figure it out. You do it in two weeks or two months. (Tony Robbins)
22:02 even if you don’t have any idea how to solve it, any idea how to get there, you will be amazed at what to come up with. And what’s interesting is: our legacy, our past anchors us to where we are today. And you have to let go of that. You truly have to let go of all this stuff in your past, what you have thought you’ve done, the infrastructure that you have built to let yourself go.
22:29 we are not our feelings, we are not our patterns. Those are things that we might identify with, but we are not them. So when I see the pattern that doesn’t work, I don’t think that the person is a broken. I don’t think that anybody is broken. I am not here to fix people. But I am here to break up the patterns that don’t work. (Tony Robbins)
24:08 so, there so many people talking shit about how big an entrepreneur you are there going to be, how much they’re going to achieve. And they don’t work on weekends. You know, I worked every Saturday of my twenties. (garyvaynerchuk)
24:45 ask yourself: am I practicing some discipline in my life? Am I doing the things that I should do because I need to do them? Or am I kind of waiting to feel a moment?
24:57 make the damned schedule! And stick to it! It’s not a bloody prison! That’s the first thing that people the wrong – they say ”Well, I don’t like to follow the schedule.” and I am like: “wrong ! Said the damn schedule up! See you would have the day you want!”
25:23 you are what you consistently do. If you look at your calendar, if you look at what you do on a daily basis, that is what going to determine your future path.
25:57 you want to be in the game? Read! The average American reads one book a year. The top CEOs in America read five books a month. That is 60 plus books per year. But immerse yourself in the books, audio, videos every day, OK? You hit all three of those. Well, I’m reading something, listening to something, watching something. These are completely different ways to learn. Find youtube channels that are good for you. (Grant Cordone)
26:22 a few work your ass off, if you focus on something larger than yourself, and you really are executing what works, you need a little grace, you might want to call it luck, if you prefer, god, union universe, but it’s there! And we can all achieve. But I think a more important skill, if you ask me, to have an extraordinary life is to have fulfillment, because fulfillment is an art, not a science. Because there is a science to making money. I do not care who you are. If you do certain things, you’re going to have too much financial stress. If you do other things, you’re going to have an abundance. There is a science to your body. Everybody is biochemically different , but there are certain fundamental patterns that if you and I follow , you will have the time of energy. If you break them , you’re going to pay the price, you will have low energy or disease. But fulfillment is an art. What is going to fulfill that you is going to be different from the person next to you. You are not going to learn that from anybody else. So you got to find it. Because success without fulfillment is the ultimate failure. (Tony Robbins)
27:22 you owe you an explanation. You need to look at yourself in the mirror and ask yourself: “why are you only giving 50%? What’s wrong with you?.” you need to put yourself on punishments. You need to tell yourself: no more TV! No more snacks! No more desserts! No more! We work it out now! No more alcohol! Not now! I can’t handle it the right now. You need to tell you that you owe you some. You never look yourself in the mirror and say: “you have let me down!” and until you get to that point, you let yourself down. You are not brave enough. You want to put it on someone else. “the reason I’m not successful is the cloud of my boss .” have you ever looked yourself in the mirror and said: “ am not waking up on time, I’m not going to work on time! I’m not quitting a 121% when I work! I let me down . ” . What changed? I changed. I stopped being a victim, I stopped saying: I’ve got to wait for good things to happen to me. And I said: I’m going to grind, am going to fight, I’m going to work, I’m going to press toy, I’m going to learn! I’m going to do everything in my power every single day to become of victor and not a victim. What do you want in your marriage? What do you want from your son and daughter? How much money do you want to make? What do you want to drive? How are you going to make a living? Stop waking up like an accident! Find out what you want! And then, once you find out which you want, to spend the rest of your natural light waking up and going after it. (Les Brown)
29:01 I don’t believe in the word “procrastination.” I really don’t believe in that word. There is no such thing as procrastination. What it is is that it is not important to you, it is not meaningful to you. It is not something that is urgent to you. And when something is not a urgent, you put it off. If it is not meaningful to you, and it’s not important to you, you’re not going to make it a priority. So what you need to do is to find out how to make it meaningful, how can you make a purposeful, how can you make it stick? And when you find that out, the promise you: you will get up early, you’ll go to work, you will be their first, and you will do what ever it takes to make that goal a reality. So, for me there is no us such thing as progress to nation, it is such thing as it is not a priority to you. (Les Brown)